Aug 26, 2009

The post in which I may offend TONS of TOES


(My sweet nephew's toes....I can deal with these)

Ok, for anyone that knows me.....you know that this post is KILLING me to publish.
I actually kept going back and forth with myself over the issue.
A part of me feels icky just thinking about it but then again another part of me just can not shake it from my mind.
I have been doing this for a week now.
A WEEK, people!
:insert heebie jeebies here:
I am going to talk about F--------feet
:insert more heebie jeebies here:
Not just any feet though.
I am going to be bold.
I am going to be brave.
I am going to write about . . . .
"JACKED UP" feet
Jacked up as in "EWWW!"
Can you tell that I am not a foot person?
I mean I can deal with itty BITTY baby feet and even my cat's paws (well, unless she has been somewhere ummmm well.....NEVERMIND)
but I CAN NOT HANDLE ANY OTHER FEET
especially "JACKED UP" FEET!
Side note: I don't even know if JACKED UP is a real term. Just go with me on this one, OK?

Anyhoo, I was looking through someone's photos online.
There I was clicking, clicking, clicking UNTIL THAT ONE PICTURE popped up.
THAT ONE PICTURE THAT WILL NOT LEAVE ME ALONE.
THAT ONE PICTURE THAT IS TAUNTING ME AS I TYPE THIS.
The feet.
The feet in this picture were not really THAT JACKED UP.
Well, ok...
To me they were.
I mean they were properly painted and all.
No hammer toe or anything.
So what was wrong, you ask?
Ok, ya know how your big toe is just that ....uh, BIG and then all the other toes go down in size ending with the smallest one, the pinkie toe?
NOT THESE TOES!
The big toe was not so BIG against the other ones.
WAIT....
Let me see if I can find an example for you.

Oh, I found one.


See what I am talking about?
"Jacked up toes"
Now, I would never EVER make fun of anyone for this.
Of course, I will make fun of your toes though.
It's just NOT right.
Oh, I know for sure.
I mean I read it somewhere.....
When God made the toes he said "And THOU Big Toe shall always be bigger than the rest."
Oh, I know I read that somewhere.
I did.
WHAT?

uhhhh
WAIT!
Don't go.
I won't make fun of your toes again.
at least not in post form

Post update @ 7:56pm : I was sitting here viewing my blog and the kids were (OF COURSE) looking over my shoulder. They said "WHOSE FEET are THOSE?"
I had to laugh.
Big Girl replied "Take a picture of my feet"
&
Lil Man was trying to get the Princess to smell his feet.

PURE JOY!
pure joy, I tell ya.

15 comments:

Chelle on August 26, 2009 at 3:55 PM said...

Must. stop. laughing!

Your post labels are killing me, girl! Hahaha!!

Amy on August 26, 2009 at 4:04 PM said...

Yes, Those are way gross...

Amanda on August 26, 2009 at 4:10 PM said...

Ugh, I am so not a foot person either. I like my own feet and my hubby and daughter's feet, but that is all I can handle. Jacked up feet just gross me out!

blueviolet on August 26, 2009 at 5:15 PM said...

If I'm not mistaken there's a sizable scar on her left foot which means she paid to have them looking that way. LOL

Polka Dot Moon on August 26, 2009 at 6:14 PM said...

You are over-the-top HYSTERICAL! And I too; DO NOT like feet!

Thank heavens I didn't see the pic you're referring too......I'd have bad dreams!

Loukia on August 26, 2009 at 6:24 PM said...

I hate feet. HATE THEM! Except for my children's feet. Those, I LOVE to death. I could munch on them all day!!

Jaime on August 26, 2009 at 6:27 PM said...

Um....ick! Not sure what's going on with those funky feet, but I have heard of people having surgery so their toes fit better into pointy heels...

No thank you. Ick, ick, ick...

TheSingleGirl on August 26, 2009 at 6:35 PM said...

Yep.

Those ARE some jacked up feet.

I saw a similar picture to what you're describing posted on Facebook and I thought the saaaaame thing.

Someone needs to inform these people that toes like that do NOT belong in pictures. Unless the intent is to upset people...and if so, it's working.

Meghan on August 27, 2009 at 9:46 AM said...

Girl! I saw the NASTIEST feet ever yesterday! The big toe looked like a thumb. Of a gorilla. Nastiness!

How bad would you hate you life if you were the pedicure-ist that had to handle those dogs? No, thank you.

Lin on August 27, 2009 at 10:44 AM said...

Yup, those are pretty funky feet.

PamperingBeki on August 27, 2009 at 12:29 PM said...

I'm giggling just knowing the hits you're going to start getting by putting the words "jacked up feet" on your blog. Bahaha!!

I just posted a picture of my own non-jacked up feet on my blog the other day. Hope you didn't hurl. ;-)

The Knutson Klan on August 31, 2009 at 1:18 PM said...

That's hilarious! You're hilarious! Sorry I don't comment much, but I really do enjoy reading your blog. My four year old is always trying to get the girls to smell his feet too. Must be a little boy thing!

~Angie

RootsAndWingsCo on August 31, 2009 at 8:34 PM said...

OK I was totally with you on not liking feet, until you got to your "jacked up" feet. Look at statues of Greek Gods and Godesses. I'm waiting...yup, their toes are this way. And how do I know? Well, mine are too! And mine could have been the ones in your picture (just smaller)! ;) So, I've always gone with the point that everyone else is just jealous that they are not like Gods or Goddesses! See where I'm going with this?! But really, feet are just gross...in general. Ew!

Rebecca
**Disclaimer**This was all written with a light tone and some slight sarcasm at points. It's hard to relay that in type. No hurt feelings were coming from me (or my feet)! ;)

Linda @ My Trendy Tykes on August 31, 2009 at 8:45 PM said...

ROFL! Rebecca, that comment cracked me up. Girl, I am all about some sarcasm. See....I knew I would offend some toes!

----the toes of a greek goddess! Rock on girl

RootsAndWingsCo on August 31, 2009 at 8:57 PM said...

Unfortunately mine don't just have a freakishly long second toe, they then make a huge jump down to the 3rd toe, and not taper off in a normal way. Odd thing is, when I have my children, one of the first things I check is to make sure they have my toes (not all of them do). I love them (my toes...well, my kids too but I was meaning my toes)! I also check my kids for a dimple in their chin. Why would I want them to have these things? I guess I like me the way I am...that, or it just gives me more people in the whole "misery loves company" place! Who knows!

Rebecca
I'm loving your humor, too!

 

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