To Snow?
or
Not To Snow?
That is the question.
Ya see, we (FOLKS) down here hardly EVER get the white stuff known to many as SNOW.
Well, there was this one time back in 1994.
Oh wait...
That wasn't snow.
That was "THE ICE STORM OF 94".
yeahh...
The weather/news people around here are so fancy.
They name BIG HAPPENINGS.
Kind.of.like
"The Great Freeze of 03"
Except you have to say it in that DEEP MOVIE PREVIEW voice.
Oh, and there are lots of special effects and sounds.
ANYHOO
We do not get snow.
Every once in awhile they will hype the kids up and scare the pants off the "seasoned folks" out there with "SNOW IS IN THE FORECAST".
The kids start designing their snow forts (in their heads).
and
The "seasoned folks" head to the market to clear out the bread shelves and milk aisle.
I said "seasoned folks" this time and NOT granny or gramps goodtimes.
See, I am improving.
a . little .
Only to get home and hear :
"We got lucky this time."
"We barely missed the snow by THIS much."
hmm....
Now I have angry children and NO BREAD.
GEE THANKS, WEATHER MAN.
Thanks a lot.
Where am I going with all of this?
I AM GETTING THERE.
I was watching the news earlier this week and 2 out of 3 kids just happened to be in here to hear "SNOW IS A-COMIN". (or something kind of like that)
That's all they heard.
That's all they wanted to hear.
THAT'S ALL THEY HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT.
Weather man said up to 3 inches!
but in weather man terms that really means a light dusting, right?
The next day....
Snow's still a-comin.
1-2 inches
great, we won't even get the dust....more like if ya blink ya may miss it
Today . . .
Ehhh (says the weather man) Snow is still in the forecast for SOME of us.
The cities DOWN BELOW HERE will receive the majority of the snow.
BUT
I still see us getting 1/2 inch to 1 inch.
uh huh
You already know what I am thinking, right?
no snow
But one thing he was MOST certain of :
It's gonna be cold.
B R R R
**************
Ok
Here's the deal.
I am challenging that SNOW.
(and weather man)
except he doesn't really know it
If it snows more than ONE INCH (which I don't see happening).
I will say "I WAS WRONG."
ON VIDEO
I will also run outside in my BRIGHT BLUE SNUGGIE and dance.
Since, I don't know any of the HIP dances of today.
I will have to break it down 90's style.
*Word to yo Mutha*
A little MC HAMMER
Running Man
Roger Rabbit
Ya know, the good stuff.
I may even toss in a "Carlton" for ya.
AND
I can do a REAL MEAN CARLTON!
Wanna take a poor girl bet?
ya know, the kind that doesn't involve $$
WILL WE GET SNOW??
Yes or No
Whatcha think?
Y'all come back tomorrow, ya hear?
or
Not To Snow?
That is the question.
Ya see, we (FOLKS) down here hardly EVER get the white stuff known to many as SNOW.
Well, there was this one time back in 1994.
Oh wait...
That wasn't snow.
That was "THE ICE STORM OF 94".
yeahh...
The weather/news people around here are so fancy.
They name BIG HAPPENINGS.
Kind.of.like
"The Great Freeze of 03"
Except you have to say it in that DEEP MOVIE PREVIEW voice.
Oh, and there are lots of special effects and sounds.
ANYHOO
We do not get snow.
Every once in awhile they will hype the kids up and scare the pants off the "seasoned folks" out there with "SNOW IS IN THE FORECAST".
The kids start designing their snow forts (in their heads).
and
The "seasoned folks" head to the market to clear out the bread shelves and milk aisle.
I said "seasoned folks" this time and NOT granny or gramps goodtimes.
See, I am improving.
a . little .
Only to get home and hear :
"We got lucky this time."
"We barely missed the snow by THIS much."
hmm....
Now I have angry children and NO BREAD.
GEE THANKS, WEATHER MAN.
Thanks a lot.
Where am I going with all of this?
I AM GETTING THERE.
I was watching the news earlier this week and 2 out of 3 kids just happened to be in here to hear "SNOW IS A-COMIN". (or something kind of like that)
That's all they heard.
That's all they wanted to hear.
THAT'S ALL THEY HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT.
Weather man said up to 3 inches!
but in weather man terms that really means a light dusting, right?
The next day....
Snow's still a-comin.
1-2 inches
great, we won't even get the dust....more like if ya blink ya may miss it
Today . . .
Ehhh (says the weather man) Snow is still in the forecast for SOME of us.
The cities DOWN BELOW HERE will receive the majority of the snow.
BUT
I still see us getting 1/2 inch to 1 inch.
uh huh
You already know what I am thinking, right?
no snow
But one thing he was MOST certain of :
It's gonna be cold.
B R R R
**************
Ok
Here's the deal.
I am challenging that SNOW.
(and weather man)
except he doesn't really know it
If it snows more than ONE INCH (which I don't see happening).
I will say "I WAS WRONG."
ON VIDEO
I will also run outside in my BRIGHT BLUE SNUGGIE and dance.
Since, I don't know any of the HIP dances of today.
I will have to break it down 90's style.
*Word to yo Mutha*
A little MC HAMMER
Running Man
Roger Rabbit
Ya know, the good stuff.
I may even toss in a "Carlton" for ya.
AND
I can do a REAL MEAN CARLTON!
Wanna take a poor girl bet?
ya know, the kind that doesn't involve $$
WILL WE GET SNOW??
Yes or No
Whatcha think?
Y'all come back tomorrow, ya hear?